My church held a corporate fast that required us to eat only things that grew out of the ground, and was not processed. So no sweets, only unleavened breads, no meat, no alcohol... nunofit!!!
It wasn't to hard for me because when I normally fast, it is total. The only thing that I normally consume on my personal fast is water.
We were instructed on how we should pray, and to an extent what to pray for. I created a list, and I prayed when a thought came to mind to pray. But as I reflect on the things God put on my heart, it mostly came down to how I dealt with people, and who I gave my time to. So looking at myself and reflecting on me and the things I've experienced, I think about my relationships past, present, and stalled.
Starting with this, I'm like a lot of people, I want to be liked. I hope that people when they look at me, they see me as someone that is nice and they want to get to know me. I've always had a diverse mix of friends I think, but for the most part they are nice. But because of that and me being nice, I've been used, which is sad. But as I've gotten older (and cynical) I've come to understand that we all "use" each other in one way or another. But if you must use me, let it be for good, and not evil.
Now let's talk stalled.... people that just kinda drift off the radar, and when you try to reach out, they give you the run around. Makes me wanna purge my phone and fb page of these people who I don't need to just take space in my life. We all have our things that we go through, but dayum, be for real with things. It makes me question exactly what type of "friends" we really were. But in the end, it kinda hurts because I do miss them. So reminder to self... people are like seasons, they come and go; they are not always meant to stay forever.
Now the present. I am overly blessed to have family who love me, and friends who love me like family. I know that I can be selfish, and get into my moments "woe is me," but I have awesome support for the ups and downs that I roll through. As I try to figure out how I can get myself settled in my life, I'm praying to be able to show my love ones in more than small ways, just how grateful I am for them.
To be honest, how God spoke to me.... had nothing to do with what was on my list. But in time fast or not, he'll speak plainly and I'll have no doubts. :-) btw... that time can't get here fast enough. LOL
