late but on time

UGH!!!
I'm tired.  I'm the person that has the best ideas.... but waits until the last minute to execute it.  I'm tired.

 I've been feeling since the first of the year, the need to purge.  I'm nesting to an extent for some strange reason, and I'm ready to make room for new.  I've even started looking for things for my "New" place... which will come once I get a job & save to move :-D

I've accepted that a move out of town/state, is more than likely to be in my future as my parents get older.  I've been on daughter duty a few times the last couple of week, and I don't worry, but it's kinda sad to watch my parents make decisions to live life a less and less because of the pains of time.

Then there is my friend.  Who wish I could just have a straight conversation with, but when I've tried in the past, it just seems to go up into the air, and falls to the floor like a lead balloon.  I can honestly say, that I've held back a lot of me from him, and limited how much of him I wanted to "let in."  I want a relationship, I'd be happy if it was with him, but when it comes to my deal breakers, I think no.  And after listening to someone make a point on some talk show, it made me really think.  "Just because he a good guy, does not mean he's the right guy."  So I'm JUST about ready, to let him go, and move on.  Wish it was easier, but I'm ok with a slow separation.  I just know that pretty much by the next time I blog, I will have had a talk, or I will have made a decision, with or without him.  And since he doesn't seem to truly express interest, taking things back & down a level shouldn't bother him.

The last 10 days have been days that have helped me to realize that I need to really get into my theme for the year which is "step-up or step-off."  I have to make the decision to let somethings and people go, so that I can create space for what is meant to be in the place it is holding.

But more importantly, I need to discern what it is I want for me.  I can only look to others for so much, and in the end, they can't do anything for me.  But God has a plan, and I'm going to release to let Him work things out.

LORD!!!!  I LOVE YOU.
BUT PLEASE!!! WORK THIS OUT NOW!!!! & NOT LATER.